Are you Influential?
Undoubtedly, you are familiar with radio program contests. One of my favorite radio stations has a daily contest where the contestant either agrees or disagrees with the truth of five trivia statements. The contestant can use three “life lines” if he or she is stumped by a statement. Frequently the contestant will agree or disagree with a statement stating 80% or higher certainty, but uses a life line just to be sure. The life lines are members of the radio station crew who readily admit they are not trivia authorities. Interestingly, if the life line advises the contestant to choose another answer (despite the 80% or greater certainly), the contestant typically goes with the life line’s advice. The life line has successfully influenced the contestant’s view.The power of influence is an important trait for effective leaders. How does one go about being influential? Many will tell you that to be influential one must be an expert on the topic at hand. Becoming an undisputed authority on the topic certainly adds credibility but what role does it play in influencing? Influencers do not spout facts and figures, experience and predictions. Influencers engage, listen, question and use well-honed interpersonal skills. Influencers read situations and are selective about how they interact with others. Those who are skilled at providing influence are not the first to speak. They don’t state the case for a decision or instantly judge a situation. Influencers listen without interrupting. They ask clarifying questions. They ensure full understanding of what others say and give signals to confirm this understanding.
Once influencers are fully engaged, in complete understanding and have established a common rapport with colleagues, they provide input. An influencer’s input is powerful because they have established a common ground as part of their sharing. Surprisingly, an influencer may state that he or she is not an expert, however their input holds a great deal of weight anyway. Influencers become a part of the solution and give creative and personal advice. Power lies in the willingness to share and engage, not in authority or expertise.
This week you will have numerous opportunities to influence. Decide how you want to handle discussions before you engage. Resist the temptation to launch into your view before you’ve fully heard the details. If asked, people will share. If told, people will get things done. Your approach will either win support and engagement, or not. The path is yours to choose.
What practical advice to you have to share that will help readers develop influencing skills? All comments and questions are welcome!
kcru commented:
When I'm meeting with a new group or we are facing a new problem, I like to listen to others and then I will try to give a synthesis of what I heard are the key concerns and look for confirmation that I'm on the right wavelength before offering any opinions. People are going to be more recpetive to any kind of input if they feel you have an understanding of their situation. Salespeople can be very good at this. In my job, after a while, all problems look the same but every person needs to be acknowledged as unique. It took me a while to figure this out. I'm less inclined to come out swinging with a solution in the first round these days (unless I'm tired, grumpy or impatient. it still happens!)
Lara commented:
Great suggestion! I personally like the idea of taking notes while listening. It is positive reinforcement to those who share and a solid demonstration of how valuable input is to you. Thanks for the response!
dubess commented:
You're in a meeting (two people or 50). Bring paper and pen. As people are talking, write down any - and all - ideas that come into mind while you are listening. Mention one or two. Or, do some research after the meeting, talk with those that are or could be involved. Make an informed suggestion to those who are involved.
Listen, have compassion (sometimes when change is involved, people get pretty upset), and involve people. Like you said, no likes to be "told". When you get people involved, get them to say, "hey, yes, that's a great idea", you'd be surprised how many more will jump on the band wagon!
